MARRIED LIFE

well, long time i didnt blog about anything so i decided to share some life changing event.on 29th may 2015, i am officially married. The irony of this is i married a girl that once broke my heart.(that is not the point today). We met when we were serving national service in kem padang hijau Kluang. i remember the first time i saw her. In my mind i said "wow, she seems unreachable!" when she saw i was looking at her, i panic and simply just wave my hand with a stupid face and try to keep my cool...that was dumb! Things played along nicely we started to talk to each other. exchanging notes like secondary school, when we get our phone, we will sms (no whatsapp at that time) and talk on the phone.we got out of the camp, she went back to Kulai to continue Form 6, i went to TARC at KL. situation was tough as we had long distance relationship. Ups and Downs of course. After 1 year 4 months of this, we finally broke up. I took this break up very hard, it was like the darkest days of my life. And to speak the truth, it still hurt till this day when i think of it. How do i handle it? Well, we are guys, we simply just don think about it. HA!I donno whats gotten into me, 4 years after break up, i decided to ask her out one day when is back at Kulai for a tea. One thing led to another, we were holding hands again. At that moment, i admit, that i never stop loving her. Again, we are guys, we simply just put it in a box and keep it somewhere else, that's how i kept it together all these years. I told myself, if i were given a second chance, i am gonna make this right. i am gonna give everything i have in this! I found her! She who will give 100% to you when she love you, she who will do anything for you. And i certainly will do the same. of cause she is not perfect, nobody is anyway. Thats what i love about her. We got married, and this few months of married life, with her by my side, so close to me. I feel complete, i wake with here by my side(sometime only la, cause i woke up late, haha), having breakfast together, drinking coffee, talking about everything like our day, our job, our problems, our baby(oh yeah, she is pregnant currently 7 months, means i will be a father is 2 more months!). recently i started a business, which consumed a lot of my time. I working 2 jobs, day and night. I felt very guilty i have less time for her, left her alone at home. When i finally get home, she is asleep. when i woke up, she went off to work. So i am very struggling to make time for her, like during lunch breaks, or maybe dinner and weekends. i will spend most of my free time with her. When the baby arrive, i need to make more time for both of them. well, i am married. so officially a family man. no more partying!! which is the whole point of marriage. If you don wanna give up that old life of yours, then don bother getting married. one you are married, games over brother. But don stop you from getting married with the one you love, cause something is worth giving something else up. At some point of our life, we have to grow up. for guys, getting married is that POINT!   

心声

我看会最后一次的post是在2010年，多久以前的事了。

我今天是所以会写blog是因为我真的不知道去哪里发泄这两个月来，看我爸爸受折磨的感觉。

在去年十月，我爸爸的左脚走路开始会痛。他去看了很多推拿或抓根的师傅，可是还是没有进展反而还恶化。这是就去了putra specialist hospital看了骨科专科Dr. CHONG。医生叫他照MRI怀疑是神经线被压倒，照出来其实没大碍，就叫我爸爸做物理治疗。

一直到今年六月，我爸爸脚还是痛，行动不方便。不过这是他发现了脚底长了一颗东西，如果碰到它就会痛。这时又回去找dr.Chong，医生帮我爸爸打了steroid，还是不会好。医生也帮我爸爸照了脚底，的确是一颗不明的东西在里面。我爸爸问医生还有什么办法把它去除，医生说，没办法只好开刀。于是我爸爸就决定开刀把那颗东西去除。在这里让大家知道，我爸爸是糖尿病患者。

开刀之前，医生做好了全部检查才开刀的。是一个小手术不需要全身麻醉。开好后医生说两个礼拜后来开线。两个礼拜过了，回来开线是发现伤口根本没好到，伤口也没长肉，医生说糖尿病照成了伤口复原很慢，所以不能再锋起来并且每隔两天就要回来洗伤口确保没有细菌感染或腐烂。

我爸爸每隔两天就去洗伤口，痛到难以形容。这样洗了两个月，在这两个月里，我爸爸的脚尾指开始发黑，我妈妈有点担心就一直问医生，医生说没事只是皮黑。到了上两个礼拜，我爸爸的脚还是没有长肉，伤口还是那么大一个，而且尾指越来越黑。痛到他受不了，问医生怎么办，医生说你可以做一双特别的鞋子，在鞋子割一个洞，那么不会弄到伤口又能走动。这时我爸爸很生气的说，为什么当时开刀前医生没建议这双鞋子，那么我爸爸就不用开刀了啊！接着医生说我爸爸可能有血管阻塞，所以不会长肉，就介绍我们到johor specialist看血管专科Dr,Mazli。听说这种医生不多，我们就答应了去看这位医生。说完以后，我爸爸去上厕所，这位dr. Chong跟我妈妈说，我爸爸的尾指可能要切除！我妈妈很生气的问他，不是说皮而已吗？为什么现在说要切除！这个他妈的医生！

结果我们去了johor specialist，我爸爸的血管阻塞问题真的很大！必须动很大的手术，医生说这个手术是bypass阻塞的地方好让血流到脚，拿伤口就会好。问题是，医生还说那尾指不能留，一定要切除！我爸爸很挣扎，一直不要动手术，因为他很怕，怕进去出不来，怕动了手术手尾很多。我们劝了他去动手术，可是医生说这个手术六个小时，所以必须检查心脏后如果没事才能动。到了手术的那一天，心脏医生进来病房阻止我爸爸动手术，因为怀疑我爸爸的心脏有阻塞，经不起这样得手术，建议我爸爸先详细检查心脏。

检查报告出来，显示他的心脏的确有阻塞，可是必须做另一个测验才能知道塞多少八仙。这是我爸爸从朋友那里得知了一名通灵的中医师傅，决定去看一看听他的意见。到了那里，师傅说我爸爸的脚是小事，因为他医好了很多这样的病患。他还问我爸爸是否年轻的时候曾经发脾气拿东西丢一棵树？我爸爸想不起来，而我们知道我爸爸的脾气，那是很有可能发生的事。师傅说丢到了拿嘟公。必须和拿嘟公道歉赔罪。他说必须去拜，只要在山上的拿嘟公都可以。我爸爸的心里已经想好要去哪里一间拿嘟公的庙了可是没说出来，毕竟师傅是新山人所以不知道我们batu的庙。哪里知道，师傅竟然把我爸爸心里想的庙形容出来，还说那间庙可以去拜。我们都傻掉！

现在我们已经回到家了，今天是第三天，一直在吃师傅给的药和洗伤口的药。我爸爸还是一直再痛，痛到不能睡觉，痛到哭。做儿子的我真的不知道该怎样做，什么决定是对的，什么决定是错的，该听谁说，该相信谁？该去求谁？我真的不知道。

我只能说，医药那么发达的时代，还是有医生会误诊。如果那个Dr.Chong早点和认真点诊断我爸爸的病情，今天就不会那么痛苦和难搞！看爸爸的折磨，对我们全家人都折磨！

如果我爸爸曾经得罪过任何人或神明，我在这里替我爸爸道歉，我不求大富大贵只求我爸爸，我家人平平安安，开开心心的活着。

supernatural studies

recently i've been expose to many supernatural encounter...

i've been very interested in supernatural event since i was a boy...the thing about being a boy is, i don have the courage to explore more.

Supernatural means relating to an order of existence beyond the visible observable universe. example to God or a god, demigod, spirit, or devil.

I show my interest before this by reading supernatural books like True Singapore Ghost Stories(TSGS) by Russell Lee. I watch movies about anti-christ, i watch exorcism movies like the exorcism of emily rose, the exorcist and the omen. These are the few movies i enjoyed watching. Then i dig in more about Lucifer the devil, how lucifer become who he is today. Whats is 666, all this stuff...well i have few encounters with spirits too. at least i thought i was an encounter. But all this is to show how much i am interested in supernatural event.

Just recently i know a friend. well, we had a lot in common, we hang out a lot. This guy know a lot about supernatural events, in fact he practice some of the so called black magic. Today i wanted to share my new interest in supernatural being. the elves (Orang Bunian) i am sure 80% of people disbelieve of denied their existence, but they exist. Elves is a mix from both human and Gin, the have beautiful looks and supernatural power. Because Gin are mostly afraid by human, so the elves chose to be invisible to human as they are shame of their kind. They exist among us un-notice.

somehow there are people who practice this art and have the ability to bind elves to a owner buy using stones which are convert into a ring for the owner to wear. The owner then have a way to summon the elves to help them out. mostly people use to find opposite sex companion. elves are gentle creature, they wont do harm to their owner or others. They are very sensitive, the owner must treat them with respect. if one disrespected them they will leave the person. the bond will be broken.

Normally the stone use to bond Elves and human is batu tulang rusuk duyung(mermaid). Mermaid is recognize as the love goddess of the sea. so this stone will help to bind elves and help the owner to find love. Some owner find this stone with other usage, for example, they use it in their business. they make themselves lovable among prospect and make them customers to their business. This is not playing dirty as this is not casting any spell or magic on them. just simply they will like you and happy enough to do business with you. in this society is all about relationship.

As you know, now is all about prove, what science cant prove is not true. but hold that thought, science cannot prove everything. This has to experience it yourself in order to believes it. If i didnt see the effect i wouldn't believe it myself. To learn more about this supernatural event, surf the net and there is tons of research for you to see.

believe it or not, its up to you guys to tell.

p/s: Share some of your supernatural encounters if you have some, i love to hear it.

my blog...

it's a long time ago since my last blog....

i guess i forget i got a place to "let it out"...

well, starting last year when i started working temporary, things had gone really bad as days goes by...well, the worse that happen to me is my house was broken in, and my lap top got stolen...thanks to those motherfuckers....i cant online and the only entertainment i had, was radio...imagine that...but i felt sorry for huey min, because her laptop gone together with mine...i don't know y, i felt guilty towards that matter...i mean bad things happen to me...but y involve her...she had to suffer together with me this long...but we made it through...

then i start doing insurance, AXA life...it was ok but tough...ofcoz tough...nothing is easy in this world...debt has been following around me...finding ways to cover it everyday...money money money...haih...she have to suffer along also...

finally after so long period of time of hanging on...things starting to be ok...i got a freelance job over at PMI, even though is tough...but i guess if i can hold on through this, everything will be fine...it was tiring....this whole project i have to finish 300++ 7-eleven outlet around kl...and trust me u will be shock to see so many outlet...which u don't even know it exist...

but i learn alot and earn not bad income....so at least all this hard work is worth it...

People.....

since the day i started this job....i've been meeting different kind of people....dont refer only to customers....but to people that work around me....starting with 4 person including me in my team....we are strong sales team....everyone got the potential....starting with the old man....that's wat we call him...he is able to perform very good in sales....no doubt about that....he is very experience....but he is very easy to get jealous...he thought he can become a manager....he will play dirty to make sure he gets wat he want....he talk bad about someone behind their backs...he lost all my respect towards him....

then the Daddy's boy...who always listen to his dad....quite a nice guy....funny....but he has no balls to stand up for himself...or perhaps he dont want to....i don understand actually....his father ask him to take another job....resign from here....he did so...so we lost him....

then there is MR cool....he act very cool in everything he do....he got alots of cables....sametime got lots of secret....he get unsatisfy easilly...but never voice out to the person incharge...he is also quite nice to be friend...but one thing with him is, he trust people too easilly....that's get him into alot of trouble....he is resigning too....kinda make me disappointed with the thing he did b4 he left....

then there is me....the donno how to say no guy...i do everything my boss ask me to....i did everything with my heart and soul....people still will talk shit about me...i shut up only...knowing that maybe this will make me grow...just hope so....

haih....

recently, very stressful...because of work, because of boss, because of her....we work together at first as consultant....she abit slow to adapt this, i can handle it fast...in fact, i manage to achieve the company's top sales for my first month there, but she a bit lag off...she don like my boss, but every time she did something wrong, my boss will stress me....is like my boss hired her bcoz of me....i don wan her to be humiliate like that, so i have to change her, train her myself....but when facing me time, she cant be serious, because she don like my boss, she also not sincerely wanna learn, all is because giving me face only do...do what they don wanna do....but how does that makes me feel??? i tried to work it out...but u all keep fucking me up....1 keep showing me faces, the other 1 keep complaining almost everything they did...at office see boss face, reach home hear her says...i cant stand this la...

boss, is memang materialistic, you give the result...they happy, don care la how u do it....this is boss, every boss in the world is the same....

her, because she don like them, everything they did, she will complaint...she will unhappy...what she did was, on the spot she will call her friend to complaint about it...then show me face and that bad ass atitude...wat the fuck i did wrong i also donno....wat does that makes me feel??? anyone think about that?? no one, cos everyone just noe how will they feel, no one thinks about what you will feel, even they tell u "i love you" everyday....and pay you to work, they are suppose to don care how u feel....if know this cannot work out rite...just terus tell me, i can accept it...don because of give me face do things you all don want to do...bcoz make me feel like crap....

recently alot of road shows have to attend....all around malaysia...yes, we will keep being apart...just bcoz i didnt show i was sad about it...doesn't mean i am happy about it...even if i am sad, life is too short to complain about something you need to do...in this world,to be easy, u need to go through hardship...not everything you do will be easy, especially earning money...

in your blog, u said u wont bising when u go admin, if you still bising, u ask me to leave you...i told u, i noe you too well, if the thing is hard for you, u sure will bising....this is you...in study, work, in ur life...u cant handle hard things well, for you to noe, i am not complaining, i am just telling you...when u face hard things, u don like to find a way to make it easier for you....you just going through it in a strait line only, donno how to pusing abit...ppl say this then u just do this only....donno la, maybe is ur fate la just enjoying life....but not mine la...i have to work, even the work how fucked up...i have to work la...u might have chance to find others jobs....u have diploma...for me, now i have to do....just hope u understand....but if you cant understand, i also cannot do anything ady... thanks for making me so sad today....good night....

工作。

已经开始做工一个月了...有什么要跟大家分享呢? 我的工作每天都要跟人分享东西....以前觉得, 在college的presentation很简单...可是, 当你要present给顾客看, 让他们能够从你的presentation中,了解全部你要表达的东西...更要从一个好的presentation, produce到一个结果....结果就是product sold...不简单, 如果只是买普通产品, 以我的present的技术, 应该没有问题, 可是我今天是买business concept...今天我的职位是business consultant....我的任务是要, 在短短, 45分钟到1小时, 要客人拿出一笔很大数目的钱, 投资我们的燕窝生意...天啊...才一个礼拜, 我已经接了4个tour(顾客)...没有sales...讲到我都快死了...结果签不到...跟以前做maxis sales完全不同...这个一定要让顾客完完全全的相信你....如果跟顾客沟通的不够, 很难要他投资吧...

bbe, 做这份工不简单, 但是我没有逼你...如果真的受不了, 就不要做吧...开始要你做, 是希望你能够从这里学很多东西...比如说, 自信, 沟通方式...等等...这些是我要你学的...看你那么不喜欢, 我也心痛啊...可是,如果你能在这里生存下去....相信你去哪...都一样可以...我会支持你的!!!加油!!!