Promise...

honestly, i am a guy who take promises very seriously...what ever i promise...i will try my very best to keep that promise...if i fail to do so...i wont feel easy...guilt will eats me...and when someone promise me something...i expect the same thing back...is keeping a promise that hard?
here is some tips;
- never make a promise if u know u cant accomplish it or there is any uncertainties
- never take a promise made lightly
- think what will the promisee feel, when the promissor did not kept his/her words(put yourself in their shoes)

well, many gave me their words and didn't kept it...i mean look what happen in the past relationship...i never promise anything that i know i cant do...or uncertainty..like said "i will marry you in the future" which i know is too soon to speak off...well, we actually quarrel about this for a few times...but anyway, that's the past...today someone breaks her promise...well...basically is a promise made one month ago...and i "was" looking forward for that...but today...disappointment once again arrived at my door step...haih...what to do...

i leave town to come kl study for almost 2 years already...and today, someone tell me something to my face...saying that, i am use to the life here now, where no people take care of me...and control me somehow...and i am use to face everything alone...and this cause me to forget how to care and take care of someone like i used to be when i was in secondary school...i was very angry...because at that particular moment...that statement was unacceptable...

then, i think back...i face this fucked up life alone...everything i face it alone...ya maybe my mum knows about the problems i face or whatever...but still, i have to deal with it alone including my fucked up life...maybe, just maybe...i really stop caring for other people other than myself...i mean, think about it...i spent most of my time alone in kl...no one care what i do, what i think and what i feel...i barely talks about my problem...and ya...maybe is true i forget how...very unfortunate...but true...so don worry...i will fuck off myself...

22nd December...3 days before X'mas, Mellaca tournament....this time, i wanna win so badly...because i think, fighting is the only thing i am good at...i mean taekwondo sparring la...not outside fighting...hah...i sucks in studies...i sucks even worse in relationship...and people will hate me at the first time meeting me...haih...what a life...but a good friend told me not to say like that...because, i am good at everything....i said "name me one"...she couldn't answer....just said...i am clever....is that so...i would like to think it as, i am cunning....haha.... anyway...i will try my best...because i love sparring too much to just let it go...i must be around it no matter what...